Words talk

“ICE-CREAM; we will pick you in fifteen- your treat” as soon as I read the message I started waiting for my friends. As planned we got to the ice-cream parlor and they got themselves the most expensive flavor. With each bite of the delicious swiss toblerone ice cream came an even yummier treat in form of gossips. From engagements to break ups, fights to make ups, classes to bunks we had discussed it all. There was silence for about five minutes in which we paid attention around; the waiter was flipping TV channels. One glimpse of the ‘Imran Khan’s tsunami’, as some newspaper named it, was sufficient to resume our chaffering. And not just us the 30 th October Imran Khan jalsa did get everyone’s attention for at least a few minutes, if not more. Now it was turn of politics in Pakistan to be canvassed. A friend: You know what our nation needs is a dictator, and an honest one. Not the one with a uniform. Everyone in our country has a god damn opinion. You ask twelve people even a simpl...

The media in Pakistan has been my true companion. Latest gift it gave me was four hours of non-stop entertainment by one of the servants of the nation; if that’s why we voted him we made the right choice. His press conference took the nation’s (or at least my) mind off the depression all around and his words served as brain-massagers. I am so glad that we vote each election so that his party stays in the light. Because we know the people of his city would always sleep with peace and a smile on their faces as long as he has power. I have heard he sends an invitation and ensures that at least one member from each invited family comes to witness the high spirited and refreshing course of fun filled activities. I tell you, had M.A. Jinnah been alive today he would have felt unworthy of the title of Quaid. What melodious voice, fearlessness and empathy our leader has for his people. Time will fall short and pages will shrink if I continue talking about our patriotic leader. Therefore I wi...

Dear media people, Almost a decade ago, liberty of Pakistani media was a breath of fresh air that was seen as the purest source of information. Today, the image has changed drastically but still it is more watched and discussed. Despite the question on the ethical code of conduct followed (or not followed) by Pakistani media. Despite the criticism of playing with human emotions to cash ratings. Despite being labeled insensitive and inhumane, time and time again. Pakistani media is watched, loved and growing popular day by day. Today, I am not writing to you to talk about what the ethical boundaries of the competent talk show hosts are. Partly because I know the race of gathering the most eyeballs by being creative has blinded us of much more serious concerns. I want to talk to you about the entertainment that our media is providing. It is no doubt both well produced and well received. But is the purpose of showing these sit-coms, game shows and opinion shows only to entertain? If th...

A friend’s Facebook status was, “I am wondering how the MQM would have survived the 2 hour press conference by Mr. Zulfiqar Mirza?” The most liked comment on that status was “They would’ve been loading their weapons :D”. The press conference by former governor of Sindh, Mr. Zulfiqar Mirza, has created much hype and, to my surprise, debate on Oh-my-God-how-could-this-be? I was not amazed at even a single sentence coming from Mr. Z.M’s mouth. He said MQM is a terrorist organization, BIG NEWS. He blamed our government of being American handmaid, like we didn’t know that? He called Rehman Malik a liar, SURPRISE SURPRISE. What did surprise me was this very obvious information is being debated on for authenticity only. As usual the focus is on discussions and not on solutions. This press conference will surely have one benefit, in the coming days we will have a lot to choose from. On T.V. different talk shows to choose from, whoever loses temper faster will win the most ratings. Off T.V. ...

A lot of criticism is in the air about the “fall of the Kalma chowk”, like it is the fall of the Pakistan economy. Many people, all of a sudden seem to be have loads of memories associated with it- which were probably made staring it, when they had to wait for a lot of time to get across the signal. Protests, SMSes and even Facebook pages have been made and dedicated to the discussion over the loss of this beautiful piece of architecture. The government’s personal interest in building this flyover is a bi-product of the discussion. This is a perfect example for why I support dictatorship for Pakistani people, mind you not military, over democracy. I completely agree that the kalma chowk monument had its significance but there is no use crying over spilled milk. Has anyone thought about the maintenance of our actual cultural heritage? Lahore fort, Badshahi mosque to name a few. Seventy-five percent of the Lahore fort has deteriorated and only twenty-five percent is in its original for...

A common Pakistani is unfortunately a pessimist-xenocentric-criticizer. No matter what walk of life he belongs to or whatever way he is making his living; he is very honest and is efficiently playing his part as a Pakistani citizen; although he is not doing anything for his country ranging from casting vote to paying taxes. The most unfortunate part is that these people mostly belong from the educated class of Pakistan.   A common Pakistani would promptly criticize the following with the given arguments: 1.      The government: Corruption and flawed leadership are synonyms in Pakistan. They are not educated, they do not have any sense of direction or strategy and all they care about is money. The urdu saying ‘note dekha, mood bana ’ (show me currency and I will be convinced) is the perfect logo for the government. 2.     The army: The once respected army is now, unfortunately/ fortunately, a center of ridicule. Major chunk of our national bud...

“Change begins from within”, “You want to change the world, change yourself” are very impressive but with all due respect clichéd phrases. It is high time; we put our words into actions. When the discussion of putting words into actions comes everyone starts thinking of all the big, fancy hard-to-implement ideas and mostly people end up doing nothing. But everyone tends to overlook all the small things which are very do-able and can have an impact even at an individual’s level. So to give it start, here’s a list of 6: 1.       Stop littering Where ever we go we make sure to leave a mark behind and the easiest way of doing that is littering. Anything from throwing an empty juice tin at the centuries old fort to banana skin at the joy land would do and then we backbite about people who do not keep their homes clean. Remind me here again how are we any different? In fact they are better, because they are at least consistent in their actions.  2.  ...

Bin Laden’s death marks a win against anti-terrorism. Confetti! But not only is there inconsistency but there are serious loop holes in the unveiling stories about the Abbottabad operation.   Here are five big question marks which force me to believe that this whole operation was nothing but a stage play. 1.       No proper communication setup If such an important leader of Al-qaeda has been living in Abbottabad for such a long time and also he has been taking major decisions of Al-Qaeda, wouldn’t he have a very strong and secure communication system? I am sure he was not relying on pigeon to convey all his messages: “Alright, I am all set in Abbottabad, its go green for the next bomb attack. Also see the map attached to the right leg of the pigeon, the red circle is where you blast next”. What if one of the pigeon falls victim to a drone attack, how many days before they can tell they need a new pigeon? If the master mind of the 9/11 attack was living in...

The other day in class when I was dozing in and out of sleep my friend poked me when her elbow saying “Oye! You are missing all the fun”. As I gained my senses I realized that the lecture discussion on strategic leadership in organizations had somehow transformed to leadership in Pakistan. I heard very valuable contributions from the class on different political parties, I was amazed that how keenly my fellows followed up on the political activities and embarrassed that I did not know peanut in comparison. A student said: “Pakistan could only prosper if it has good leadership, Malaysia was on the breach of collapse too when Mahateer Muhammad came and changed it all.” Another said: “Pakistan needs a dictator; this spoiled nation can only be straightened with a rod” Our professor asked “Where is such leader going to come from? ‘Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me’ and as far as Pakistan is concerned it has been fooled by its leaders for as many as four times...” Bui...

Even Parke Kunkle, the person who made the discovery, is not embracing the new signs. The change in the format of the newspapers horoscope section and the addition of a thirteenth sign, which is also an odd number. More work! The need for updating zodiac signs of celebrities everywhere, starting with Wikipedia. The change in compatibility, since now you are compatible with certain zodiac signs you previously were not compatible with. For a hardcore believer in astrology this means lots of changes. A change in zodiac personality traits equals to a change in zodiac personality perception, which evidently equals to not-easily-digestible. Astrologists are still debating the usefulness of the discovery and deciding on whether or not it will even have an impact. Astrology has lost its credibility, and while there have been issues with the science since its inception, this recent discovery is the final blow. Many twins are now crabs, many crabs are now lions, and many lions are now v...

All is well that ends well. What about when all is well but does not end well? Like when you are excited, yet surprised, but excited to enroll in one elective course you pick by choice in a semester and enjoy the lectures all along, learn a lot and consequently perform decent on evaluations but end up victim of tough grading? Is that not well because it did not end well? Or is it well because it was great learning? Let’s simplify and do a weighted-performance-matrix-thing. Weightage Scene A Scene B Grade/ Your learning from worlds point of view 0.8 0.9 0.2 Learning 0.2 0.2 0.9 Total 1 0.74 0.36 In Scene A you have this amazing grade which can be achieved by various ways including fair useless means i.e. route learning etc. and unfair means i.e. cheating, flattering the instructor etc. In Scene B you have learned a lot out of the course but end up with a poor grade*, thus your will be considered one grade lesser in tha...

Shameless or should I call the self-proclaimed-judges-of-other’s-deeds hopeless? I was amazed to see people celebrating other over the murder of governor of Punjab. Let’s review the reason for murder of the governor in the first place; HE WAS SHOT BECAUSE OF HIS CALLING THE BLASHEMY LAWS AS THE ‘ KALA KANOON’ . Although I completely disagree with the victim’s approach towards the blasphemy laws but I condemn the execution of the assassination; if every walking person has the right to pass and carryout the judgment I wonder why do we have the courts, judges or even laws to begin with? The irony of the situation is that you are trying to be a supporter of a religion by doing exactly what’s disliked in the very religion. Congratulating on someone’s death? Seriously? I would quote an event as described in Sahih Al-Bukhari ( Volume 2, Hadith 399) : “ A funeral procession once passed in front of the Prophet Muhammed (peace be upon him) and he stood up out of respect. When he was told the pe...