(*the story is fictional..... or is it?)
I was stressed. There are multiple signs you start sensing
when you are stressed; these signs usually amplify around stressors.
Now I know you must be thinking I made up this word for
you-know-whoEVER but that is not true, this is an actual word and you can
google it. Stressors could be in any shape or form.
Anyway I started seeing signs like irritability etc etc… (and well it's the internet and that’s all
you get to know)
But it really hit me when I noticed I was becoming
defensive. For those of you who know me, I am not a defensive person at all; I
am mostly very okay with making mistakes and being wrong. Because, well, to err
is human. But in this state of stress and anxiety I had become defensive and
felt the need to justify my actions. This enlightenment dawned upon me in the
holy place of ‘second cup’.
I was hanging out with a friend and I volunteered to place
the order. My friend wanted a tall Americano. And when the order came it was a
grande?! HOLY MOTHER OF COFFEE BEANS!
The dude could not get the order properly. And I JUSTIFIED
to my friend how it was NOT MY FAULT that order went wrong? And told the server
how he needs to be more attentive. Best part - no one cared, neither the server
nor my friend. The cost was negligible and culprit could be any. I had overreacted.
After this life changing experience. I started thinking even
more or to rightly put it, I started ‘over-thinking’. I started critically
analyzing my actions and life, and actions and life of my pet dog, Snoopy. So
an apple to apple comparison could be drawn. And all the research got me this, “I
have a lot of time on my hands to think. This is a luxury not afforded by many.
Usually, people are super busy in their lives; working to pay the bills, make
the ends meet. Finding happiness by giving away all things that bring happiness
to get it, that's a mind f***! they don’t realize until they are on the death
bed and then they say something, share/like-worthy, like ‘live your life the
way if you knew you only had a year to live’”. Unexpectedly and unfortunately,
the technique of ‘over-thinking’ did not help!
But there was one silver lining. I discovered that I have
little problems and I have a lot of time. The entrepreneur in me as always
thought of an idea that would help people and not make any money. There was a
gap, people don’t have time and I have the time. I devised that I would put
my self up for selflessly use my time to try out stress relieving experiences;
after all, ‘service to humanity is the most satisfying feeling’. My dad said
told me this quote, those party poopers seeking a source.
To forward my social cause, I booked a trip to Maldives. I
went to a friend and tried to convince her to go with me. She said something
about a ‘free meal’ and why should she spend all that money to go to Maldives
with me. She told me its ‘chahrtay suraj
ki duniya (the world belongs to the rising sun)’ and I thought she meant we
should go to Japan. But really, she was saying that she doesn't care what I
drive or wear and she likes me for me and would be happy to spend time with me.
I was so happy to hear that I promised to get her brother a job through my aunt
in the government.
Let’s call my friend ‘Fair weather’. So, me and fair weather
set to Maldives. We landed and I felt half of my stress was gone. I could smell
the ocean. It was almost sunset and colors of purples and pinks were spread creating
a transition between the blue of the sky and bright orange of the setting sun. There
were no clouds. I thought to my self, ‘the environment around makes all the
difference; I should run away form my problems and settle here to live a
simpler life’. With that thought, that day, I slept thinking of my house-help’s
home made cookies and milk that I did not get that night.
The next day Fair weather suggested we go to the beach. We
spent the whole day there. There was a masseuse and I decided what better than
to get a relaxing foot massage for stress reliving. That B****, the masseuse!!
That was not a relaxing massage, not for the first 10 minutes of thirty at least.
She said ‘I know the pain you feel’. You are stressed! I had travelled 1000 of
miles to hear that from a woman who barely spoke the same language as me.
Clearly it didn’t work, trip to Maldives is not stress
reliving. Thinking to try yoga! Ofcourse, the sweet heart that I am, I will
share my findings with you folks!
